I am reading the account of Leah and Rachel in the book of Genesis and suddenly it hit me. The dilemma, it is not even the dilemma, it is the emotional pain of being the second wife. When you read Genesis 29:31-35 (go ahead read it now), you can feel the pain Leah is experiencing, of being the unloved, the second wife. Look at the names of her children and story behind each. She desperately wants the love of her husband. (Let me clear the air right off the bat, I am not talking about supporting polygamy.) She finally gives up and says, God’s love for me is enough.
There have to be ladies out there who can totally relate to this story. I am not going to pretend as a man to have any idea of what a lady goes through when she begins to realize that she is the second wife. By the way, there are many different means at your husbands disposal to make you feel like the second wife. Your husband’s job, hobby, sports team, etc., may be his first wife, you feel like number two. You have done everything to make him love you, but it has not happened. God’s words to you are this, “Come unto me, and I will not cast you out.”
Husbands! Maybe you need to go home tonight and sit down with your wife and ask her how if she feels like the second wife. Have you noticed what she has been doing for you? Or, have you like Jacob, been ignoring her effort? Eventually, if you keep ignoring her, she, like Leah, will stop bearing (and I don’t mean children), she will stop caring and withdraw even further from you.